With those long and dark winter evenings now upon us surely it’s time to think about some basic “life improvement” that doesn’t involve adopting vegan principles or tying ones self in knots following tantric sex advice from Sting and Trudie ( don’t put your hip out old boy!). If you can separate yourself from your various devices - even for just half an hour a day - maybe it’s time to think about how we used to live. Yes go on do it - go on - there you go. Now that wasn’t too hard. If you need to take a break or go to a “safe space” then feel free. We can resume whenever you want. Don’t worry, this will only take very few minutes and then you will be free to get back to Facebook where you can spend the rest of the day posting favourably filtered photos of your spiffing, rollicking rollercoaster fun packed life for all your friends to see. But for now cast your mind back to a time when you still had original thoughts and dreamt of bikes and holidays and catapaults and fuzzy felt and wagon wheels and Barbie and Ken, and dreaded weekly pianos lessons with Mrs Crevice who had her hair tied back in a tight bun and inflicted music on her pupils with a mindbogglingly relentless ill humour. Remember her? Well good news boys and girls - that peculiar smell wasn’t moth balls - it was formaldehyde! And it can only keep an old harridan alive for so long. Yes yes yes she’s gone and in her place there now sit legions of youthful fun and friendly music teachers just waiting to reintroduce you to the long lost pleasures of simple uplifting, warming, fulfilling music learning for fun. Don’t pretend that at some point in your life you haven’t fantasized about breaking the monotony of a dull works party by unexpectedly, and to the great astonishment of your wage slave colleagues, striking up Great Balls of Fire on that neglected piano in the corner of the sterile hotel suite organised by your dullard managers for this colourless Christmas party. Of course you have. Now I know you are itching to get back to your I- phone x and of course feel naked and vulnerable without it. But just before you slip back into the digital present and feel compelled to take a selfie just to show your frightened and uncertain self that you still exist, take a moment and think of that great pioneer Jerry Lee Lewis astride that grand piano and ask yourself - could that be me? All blond quiff and gold sequined stage jacket. Yes - it could.
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